You're Fired!

Some day in the near future I'm going to get fired for saying what I really think.

I can be stealthy for a big guy, so I stood behind the husband and wife without making a sound as their eight-year-old son poked a hole is several packages of hamburger with his finger. They were laughing as if this was somehow "acceptable behavior". 

As the department manager over the area, when I throw away too much product, it reflects on how I'm graded as a manager. Waste is not a good thing in retail. 

I could tell that they weren't going to stop him on their own as I originally hoped. So I cleared my throat.

"Ahem" I said just behind the couple.

I could tell that I had startled them.

"Kaleb, please don't touch the meat" the wife said hastily after seeing that it was an employee standing behind her. At least she looked sheepish because she had been caught. The husband was a different story. His look of contempt suggested that I go mind my own business.

"Sorry" the woman said "he's at that stage where he has to touch everything".

"It's no big deal, Joyce" said the man "he can just repackage the meat, isn't that right?" He addressed the last part to me.

"Actually, no." I reply "I'm required to dispose of any meat product that is handled without gloves."

 "Well, that's pretty extreme" says the husband "why don't you just cut out the area that has been touched and repackage the meat and put it back out?"

"Why don't you teach your precious bundle of joy the difference between right and wrong" I want to say out loud.  

Instead I said "I'm just following company policy."

As I lean over to gather the several packages of meat, I hear the couple walk off. There is some sort of argument going on. I hear the wife say something about "buying the meat".


I can tell that the man is exasperated with his wife.

In a not-so-quiet voice he says, "Don't worry, Joyce. I can read that guy like a book. He's not going to throw that away, he's going to repackage it and it will be back out here in five minutes. He's just mad that he actually has to work instead of sitting around."


Sitting around? Apparently he has done me a favor by not teaching his child good behavior.


After work I decide to stop by the gas station to buy a candy bar and soda for the drive home. And guess who works there?


He had just mopped up a large spill in front of the soda fountain. A mother and her young son were standing off to the side of the spill.


"What do you say to the man?" asks the woman to her son.


"Sorry for making a mess" says the young boy. I could tell he was on the verge of crying.


"Well, next time maybe you shouldn't touch the pop machine" replies the man harshly. It was easy to see that he was angry, and the apology wasn't accepted.


I could tell the mother was shocked by the man's reply. She looked like she was about to say something, but she was obviously too much of a lady. So instead she led her son away who was now in tears. When they got outside, she knelt down and hugged the boy and whispered something in his ear. Nodding, the boy smiled and they got into their mini van.


The man walked off pushing the mop bucket and muttering angrily. He wasn't paying attention, so he didn't even realize who I was.


When I left the area, somehow size 14 shoe prints got all over his freshly mopped floor.